It's gonna take a while...

Today I suddenly realized that I could die in this war. It's not that I'm freaked out or something. Not so deep inside me, I understood it from the February of 24th. But now it's getting so real as never before. Of course, I don't wanna die and I don't wanna be a soldier in the war. But who wants? 

Sometimes I think I know the answer. "Do russians want the war?" – I could be wrong but there is some Russian song that started with these words. So do they want a war? Of course, they do. And don't believe in any bullshit they might sing. In its history, Russia has almost always fought in some kind of war, with short periods of break. How do you think they got so huge territory?

 Of course, there always is a difference between "wanting a war" and "fighting in the actual war". In the first case, you're seating in front of your TV, drinking some vodka (ok, a lot of vodkas), and believing in Russian superiority, and elves, vampires, gremlins, Ukrainian nazis, or whatever. In the second your dear complexed dictator took your ass away from a warm sofa and ordered you to die for what? For the land, you've never seen and for the people, you really don't care about? And at this moment you are not even beginning to realize these people are hating you.

So it is not surprising that many russians try to leave the country. Not because they understand that they are gross neo-imperialists (they do not), but because they just want to live and watch from a safe place how their not-so-talented neighbors sacrifice their lives for the empire.

 But many will go... You know what? I don't feel any pity for them. Even more: I know a guy in Russia. We didn't speak after the February of 24th, but he seems to be not the bad guy. So it is better if he chooses a prison instead of going to Ukraine. Because if that happens I'll meet him on a battlefield I'll pull the trigger. I have no doubts